We were very poor – and surviving in a one room and kitchen shanty at Pandara road in early 80s. I remember that raising the rent by 50 rs would throw life off-gear. The last weeks were usually managed by scrapping through or taking some small loan from her favorite teacher friends like Shironmani teacher or Kala teacher. The first time we were completely debt free (sometime in 1990s and after the “1986 pay commission”), and I scrapped through 5000 rs from tuition and gave her as a gift, there were tears of joy.
She managed all this with prudence and patience – and the AIR playing tamil songs from “lankai olikuttu tavaram” at 4.30 pm for half n hour after she was back from school, and making “Narasus Kaappi” in that small kitchen was her hour of Solace. When she could be quiet and all by herself – slowly whispering Sivaji (her favourite actor) singing “kallellaam manikaa kallaguma..” That’s her – and I am so glad to be a part of these ritess – with her in that small Kitchen, where we could only walk in a column the four steps to the other side (because utensils were kept docked all the way). She and Dad brought us from there.
• Despite all of this, Dignity is her signature. She managed Scouts master role and the primary school admissions at DTEA. Not one parent I have met in all these years has forgotten the kindness of “Muthulakshmi Teacher” , her ability to take “no donation” and let good kids join the school, her incorruptible nature, her stature as “strict and loving”.
There was an orange box (bday gift toffees distributed and kept recycled) in her school cupboard with coins and money in it. When I visited her in between classes for some work, she would open this box and give me one “orange roll” candy or “ravalgon” toffee (5 paise each) that she kept for me, from having received it from some kid on his bday (remember how on bday, we would go class to class giving toffee to teachers, like a supreme achievement”). The only bribe she ever took and kept.
• I remember rehearsing in the kitchen (at 6 am morning, drinking kappi) for Tamil oratorical competitions, which she would force me to volunteer in. Bharathiyar kavithaigal, songs from Naladiyaar, Aaatthi chudi – I enacted them all in stage and won prizes etc, but the works began in a small kitchen in winters – she cooking, correcting my stanza pronounciation, explaining “old tamil” verse meanings “”Tamarai ponmuthu chavaranko rosaipal” appadina ennanna – what that means is..she would say slicing valakkai - raw banana for curry ).
• She really loved her time at DTEA (both branches). The teacher parties at DTEA at lunch (more like potpourri – every one bringing food from home, ordering a cold drink from “Damodaran”, and sitting and gossiping in V-A small benches). I know because either I or Santosh swaminathan will be called if there were an excess of gulabjamun. That is why I and he both look like Gulabjamun even today ..Ha ha ha..
• I knew even as a kid that I can take only “fair things” to her, and morality matters – she would not listen if there is anything immoral to it. I cannot call her mom in school. I cannot fake her signature in report card (did that once and was caught). Once Paddy lost 100 rs while going to market (a big sum in 1980s, even bigger for us), once he gave 40 rs to a beggar (my brother did such things even when we were like that) – but there was a scolding for him, and no transmission of blame to the Dad (the angry one). So many times we have been saved.
Happy 78th birthday, Mom! I want you to know I love you a lot, when you are alive and kicking.
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